The first time that I can recall not being content was when I got a doll for my birthday and my friend got a polly pocket for her birthday a little while later. Or maybe it was when I had salt water sandals and someone else had jelly shoes. Although, watching my own children, I know it started earlier than that. Probably wanting my brothers GREEN cup when mine was RED. I have to confess, I felt being a child was a hindrance,there were so many important things I needed to do in life that I couldn't do until I got my driver’s license..until I was married....until my husband was out of college ...when my children started sitting through church quietly! I can't do all these "important" things I need to do in life until...fill in the blank.
Can you relate? Do you find that you are happy when you think about why you don’t like what you have or why you don’t have what someone else has? Of course not.
The more you try at holiness, through the grace of God, by serving Him the more you will be satisfied in God and therefore, be happy.
Peace. Satisfaction. Joy that comes by trusting in God.
That is contentment.
You have to trust that God has your best for you.
If you don’t trust him. You are in unbelief. You are in sin. You are unhappy. You are in misery. You are discontent.
Webster’s dictionary defines contentment as: rest or quietness of the mind in one's present condition
Contentment is not a one time "I'm content, so I am content for the rest of my life" character trait. It is on-going, because new/different circumstances come our way all the time, giving us new opportunities to live it out.
Contentment is not dependent on circumstances, it is having a view that God is bigger than my situation and I can trust Him in all things.
It is a shift in attitude. Contentment is a choice.
Gratefulness, Joy, Peace, Self Control are all examples of the fruit of contentment that are important in EVERY stage of your life. Elisabeth Elliot says, “Even a stage is a gift. This gift for this day. The life of faith is lived one day at a time, and it has to be lived-not always looked forward to as though the "real" living were around the next corner. It is today for which we are responsible. God still owns tomorrow.”
-Contentment is a gift from God Eccl. 3:13 “that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil - this is God’s gift to man”
-1 Tim. 6:6, "Now godliness with contentment is great gain."
-Carolyn Mahaney tells us, "A gentle and quiet spirit is an inner disposition of humble contentment and quiet tranquility rooted in an unwavering trust in God and His purpose."
Check out the Proverbs 31 woman and her list: she was working eagerly, bringing food from AFAR, getting up while it was dark and staying up after dark, making breakfast every morning, buying fields, planting vineyards, trading assets, helping the needy, clothing her family in SCARLET, making fine bed linens and selling them, availing her husband to be an elder, and even having strong arms! If that isn't enough, she is an example of practical contentment, too. How? Proverbs says, "she can laugh at the days to come” Contentment shows visible joy.
The first practical way to attain contentment is to seek God for it. Philipians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
- Choose to be grateful (make a physical list) This is a journal entry of mine that I found fit to this specific topic.
Michael woke me up at 4 this morning to help him change David and the sheets, blankets and pillow that were all soaked from urine (note to self: next time make sure David is changed right before bedtime). As we all laid back down to sleep Liam started crying from downstairs. I moaned out loud, did I really have to get up AGAIN? and I moaned the WHOLE way down the stairs. As I came to his bed I saw his scrunched sleepy face I realized, I had a choice, I could enjoy this time with Liam (we don't get much one on one) or I could be grumpy, but either way I would be awake. An image of my friend, Aletha Knopp, a mom of 7 nearly grown children, came to mind --- when she held Liam for the first time. As she squeezed his tiny babieness to herself. I'm sure she was thinking "how did it go so fast?!?" and I think she said something of the sort to me at the time.
Last night I watched my mom hog hold Kristi's 2 week old baby, and tell her something about even though it is hard with lots of littles ENJOY this time with your baby.
I laid there and snuggled a blanket around Liam.
Okay, here’s the list part! Liam is my gift from God. Liam, full of life and energy, smiles and laughter. I love his fluffy hair and 6 teeth, his pudgy thighs and hands and long eyelashes.
Thank you, Lord, for my middle of the night awakenings with Liam. Help me to always treasure him. Oh, and Lord, I think I'm going to need more help tomorrow because of being tired!
Other practical ways, besides making a list, include:
Speak the truth of God OUT LOUD to yourself. John Piper says, “ Hoping in God does not come naturally for sinners like us. We must preach it to ourselves, and preach diligently and forcefully, or we will give way to a downcast and disquieted spirit.” I want you to think of a particular instance that you are struggling to be content with right now. We’re going to do an exercise. It can be as simple as not being happy with your salt water sandals because someone else has jelly shoes! We’re doing this exercise so that you can see that it help. REPEAT AFTER ME: “Self, God uses whatever means He chooses to grow each person therefore, I should be content in this situation (FILL IN THE BLANK) because God’s purpose is to grow me. The Bible says in Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You. Help me to keep my mind on you, Lord, and trust you.
Each person has several thousand thoughts EVERY day. Each bad thought is a catalyst to hundreds of bad thoughts. Each good thought is a catalyst to hundreds of good thoughts. How many good thoughts do you have?
Contentment is allowing the Holy Spirit, through self control, take our minds off of the things of this world that don’t satisfy and replace them on things above, which do satisfy and gives peace. The power of the Holy Spirit, the same power by the way that raised Christ from the dead, gives our minds the ability to exercise self control and to think on things above.
Now that we know how to attain it how do we maintain contentment?
Ask yourself pointed questions.
One lady was struggling with being content with decorating her new home. Her husband asked her some great questions that she keeps to re-evaluate her heart.
1) Are you content and grateful for what God has provided, or are you thinking about the next or better thing you want?
2) What are you more aware of: God's amazing provision of what you have currently, or the material possessions that you don't have?
3) What purpose do you want your home to serve? Are you more desirous of impressing others with your decorating skill or serving them—and glorifying God—through hospitality?
Do you have questions like these? I didn’t until I read this and was convicted by it. You should have these questions! Write yourself a note to do it when you get home! Ask your husband or dad to keep you accountable.
Other ideas for contentment maintenance include:
- Discussing happiest moments from the day at the end of each day
- Prayer time each evening to thank God for each of the seasons he has you in
Purposing to think about life from God’s perspective. (the way I do this is by having scripture posted in the house at different places I am likely to see them - specifically for me - is on the computer, and in front of the sink)
We are to face all circumstances with contentment that Christ will meet our needs.
Charles Spurgeon wrote,"Be content with such things as you have, since the Lord has ordered all things for your good. Take up your own daily cross; it is the burden best suited for your shoulder, and will prove most effective to make you perfect in every good word and work to the glory of God.
So whether your struggle is being grateful for your RED cup, or realizing that you get to be at home making forts with your siblings because you don’t have your driver’s license yet, whether your daily cross be somewhat light, a fussy toddler like I have or heavy, such as struggling with severe health issues or caring for a needy family member, remember that Divine Love, our Lord, has put you where you are, and so there is the best place to be.
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Stephanie Garvey is a stay at home mom of 2 energetic boys and the lucky wife of their dad. You can catch up on their latest and greatest at http://www.thejoycenteredlife.blogspot.com/
